It's a Girl!

Details to come after we've had more sleep... But here's a bit to tide you over.

Baby Girl Fairfield (first name still TBD)

Born into her father's hands on 8/12/11 at 5:16pm after 17 hours of labor

8 pounds 0.4 oz

We are all adjusting well as a family of four. Soren is in love and is a wonderful big brother!

20 days left...

...until we might expect this babe. Give or take a couple weeks, since these things aren't usually so predictable. Given the hot and humid weather we've had non-stop this summer I'm hoping for "take." My delicate, west-coast-raised constitution, pregnant or not, is unable to handle heat indexes of 113 with any measure of grace. Or even 104, for that matter.

The important preparations are done! The freezer is stocked with healthy, homemade dinners and lots of ice cream (both are of equal importance, as you know). The dresser has been put together and filled with clothes and cloth diapers. Car seats are installed. Soren's bouncy chairs and swings have been dug out of the basement and cleaned. The co-sleeper is ready to place by the bed. Our collection of slings, mei tais, and wraps are washed and waiting for a babe to fill them. Champagne is chilling in the fridge.

This week I hope to check off the remaining less-important preparations from my list and use my 10% off Babies R Us coupon to buy the last odds and ends we need. Then I'll be about as ready to double my number of children as one can be... whew, I'm thinking the dresser was the easy part.

The Windy City

Lisa's mom ended up surprising us both by offering to watch Soren for five days while sending us to Chicago for five days of vacation. Read that sentence twice, because it's profoundly amazing! Taking a visit to Chicago in July sounds like a terrible idea on paper, but it ended up being lovely. Perfect, even! It never got hotter than the mid eighties, which is Utopia for Chicago weather.

We could never thank Ruth enough for giving us this respite in the midst of multi-tiered chaos. The worst part of the trip was all the walking that we did, which takes its toll when you are 7+ months pregnant. Phew. But the best part of the trip was basically everything else. Now, brace yourself for photo overload! 

The view from our dowtown hotel. I miss seeing the shimmery river every morning.

The detailed architecture was amazing.

We saw a show of hand-painted movie posters. We weren't supposed to take pictures, but c'mon! How could you resist?

First Chinese food we've had in a long time.

Part of our Architecture Tour, where we toured the river of Chicago while hearing about the historic architecture. It sounds dorky and boring, but it ended up being really fascinating and well worth the money.

BTW, does this look familiar?

Yep! It's Wilco~! (who are from Chicago)

Chicago Chinatown is the 4th Largest in the Country, which means it's pretty dinky. BUT still had a few gems, including this treat shop. We bought dried kiwi, ginger, lemon slices, Hokkaido squid, and plums. Soooo good...

The exhibit was about whales. Though being so pregnant might make one feel like a whale sometimes...?

Field Museum was beautifully laid out. My new dream job is to be their exhibit designer.

We took four types of public transportation: commuter trains, buses, cta, and taxis. We felt pretty urban.

From the Trump Tower. Did i tell you that i miss the river?

Ravinia Festival: a surreal collection of Classical music fans!

Along with several hundred other people, we made a picnic and silently listened to Andre Watts with the Chicago Symphony Orchestra. After being the youngest patron of opera and classical music virtually wherever I have heard it, this was a mind-blowing event. I couldn't believe the gigantic crowd amassing to respectfully listen to classical music. I couldn't recommend this enough-- we had food, drinks, and listened to Rite of Spring as the sky faded to starlight. Wow.

Wisconsin-baked rhubarb crackers with savory cheese. So wonderful.

What is the connection between a tentacle man and a dog? I dunno, but it makes me want to watch the movie!

Lisa pointed out to me that this was actually the most uninterrupted time the two of us have ever spent together! I think it's going to have to be an annual event.

55 days to go....

Our due date, August 21, is hurdling towards us at full speed. This is taking some getting used to. August used to seem far, far away. Years away, even!

Since I was never in labor with Soren, I will assume that this babe will be about a week "late," which is the average gestation for a first-time mom. But, since we have learned quite well that these things are difficult to predict, we are starting to get some of the big baby projects underway.

newborn diapers prepped

post-newborn diapers ordered (a special thanks to two deals online that saved us nearly$120!)

dresser (and a few irresistible accessories from the IKEA Fabler collection) purchased and patiently waiting to be put together.

car seats purchased

Still to do:

-Order remaining cloth diapering supplies (new wipes, pail liners, one or two more newborn covers)

-Wash Soren's newborn clothes

-Install car seats and schedule a car seat check with a local CPST

-Sew slip covers for the ghetto pads on our glider chair

-Stock freezer with meals

-Desperately try to find more boy names to add to the list of possibilities in the likely event that

this sweet babe will make us the parents of a pair of brothers (being that there are actually no boys' names that I like, this might be the most challenging task on our to-do list)

-Remember to give plenty of extra love and cuddles to this soon-to-be big brother:

this is how Soren "listens" to the baby's heart

sweet, happy boy

Today is a special day~!

It was like Christmas-- we started the day with a nice wake up (lots of family cuddling) and a simple breakfast of eggs, english muffin, straberries, and coffee/hot lemon+molasses. Then, we opened Soren's presents. He is three years old today!

After living with this critter for three years now, I forget how much of a transition it has been. Won't you join me in a bout of looking back? :)

>6 weeks in the Hospital. He weighed fewer than 6 pounds at this point after being born 9 weeks early.

Soren at 6 months! You can already see his zany personality coming out!

Around 7 months, learning to crawl.

Just under 1 year. Ditto the personality thing!

Just past 2 years old, with my parents.

2 and a half, near Shenandoah. Still a baldy!

Almost three! You can't tell here, but I have probably lost a lot more hair. Thanks, kid!

My sweetie. Also, he's not wearing any pants. See? Sooo mischievous!

Today Lisa and I are taking Soren out for Indian brunch for buffet at Apna! I am so excited to get a date with my two favorite people in the world, eating one of Cincinnati's strongest culinary treats. 

Now, I have to say that having a baby is pretty cool. But watching a baby turn into a toddler and then a little boy...! That's unlike anything I've ever experienced.

On Conversing.

One of the worst parts of watching your child grow up is knowing that they will never return-- they will never cuddle, laugh, play, or cry in the same way. It's hard not to feel heartbroken a little bit everyday.

One of the best parts of their growing up, however, is the excitement that comes with new changes. My favorite thing now is being able to hold conversations with Soren. Consider our chat this morning:

Soren: Soren have it?

Leif: Oh, no, sweetie. This is a big pill. 

S: Soren have big pill?

L: Oh, it's too big buddy. You couldn't swallow it.

S: (In silly voice) Soren have it!

L: Oh sweetie. It's too big for you. You'd try to swallow it and it'd get stuck in your throat. Then you wouldn't be able to breathe, and... you'd choke.

(Long pause as I start to imagine the scenario).

S: (Long pause): Soren try it?

Thinning of the Branches

It's easy for me to say to myself, "Well, years from now, this won't matter" or something to that effect.

It's important to focus on the future and think about what will be best for the three of us in our life after graduate school, our life after Ohio, or wherever we end up next. But it also is important for me to stop, take a breath, and look at my son in the eyes before I finish cooking dinner for that night. I know that I want to have a good job, but also, I don't want to wake up in 10 years and realize that I completely ignored my son because I was too preoccupied with future plans.

Sometimes I feel guilty for just stopping and getting sidetracked to put up a posting like this. Why? I suppose because I think i should be doing something else. Sometimes it is good for me to just buckle down and work... but sometimes distractions are nice, too. It's true that years from now it won't matter how tough our lives are now, because the hard work will have paid off (hopefully). But isn't it also true that the hard work won't matter if we don't stop to take a few moments of pause to revel, play, blow off steam, and be silly?

Sometimes I feel that the longer I am alive, the more interests I pick up. Realistically speaking, I can't pursue everything. It's like being a tree with too many branches. I simply can't sustain them all.

At the end of our lives, maybe neither really matters: whether we were silly or whether we were studious. We can't take any of our achievements, possessions, or memories with us. All we can really do is live a life that is  full, enjoyable, thoughtful, honest, and peaceful. I know that graduate school will not be my life forever, so I don't want to base my entire future on it. But also, finding a job and working at a job will not be my entire life, and it's quite likely that I will look back one day and think, "It sure was nice to read a hundred pages each week on theoretical ideas and 20th century Japanese art history." Hard to imagine now, but then again, sometimes I miss being cooped up for hours at a smelly, stuffy print shop. At the time, though--ai yaaaa-- it felt like i was being tortured! 

So yes, even though I feel pulled every which way, I truthfully enjoy most of it. The trick for me is to remember to take a breath and face each thing fully, exist in that moment, and allow myself to make mistakes. I can no longer be the perfectionist that I used to be, and I have to start shutting down distractions. Let's say that I'm a tree, and at this point I need to start cutting off branches to let them grow a bit thicker and stronger. I do believe that getting older has made me a more patient, joyful, and resilient person. Those branches are blooming. So now, it's time to curb my distractions and prune a bit. Time to let that fruit grow~!!

My son, the DJ, is nearly three years old.

Yowza... so I am now the dad of an almost-three year old! That's pretty wild.

So far, I really don't feel much older than I did as a single twenty-something year old. I wonder when that will change? I assumed that being a parent would make me feel pretty old, but so far the opposite has been true. It's been so fun to hang out with my little boy each day, eating breakfast, listening to cds, and making silly noises. I can honestly say that being a dad is pretty fun.

Now, I won't spill too many details, but Soren's upcoming party will certainly incorporate his well-documented love of cds and records. He loves to play them ceaselessly, though he's not exactly careful with them. I've taken to making cd-rs for him so that he doesn't scratch our (and the Library's! Gulp!) cds. I was rather tickled with this last batch.

 DAMIEN JURADO:

I don't think this is Soren's favorite, but he does like the airplane on the front. To me, it matches the sweetness and melancholy of Jurado's music.

 THAO with The Get Down Stay Down:

"Bag of Hammers" was one of the first songs I sang to Soren each night, while he was taking a bath. When he was very young, maybe a year and a half, he used to try to sing the "Oh-oh-oooooh" part with me. But now he acts really shy.

I wish i could have recorded that to post on YouTube. I think Thao would have loved it.

 JANELLE MONAE:

I put "Tightrope" on first, and Soren really loves the beat. He tries to sing along with Monae's opening yell: "Whoooooooa! Another day!"

This is one of the cds, apparently, that "Daddy sings on it."

 TOOTS and the MAYTALS:

Soren really likes reggae, and he definitely, specifically, loves Toots. He used to ask for this cd by name ("Toots CD!") and loves the fake bird calls on the first song.

I love watching him dance to this. When i made him this copy, he got a gleam in his eye and bellowed, "Awwwwww! It's TOOOOOOTS! Toots CD on it!"

 MICHAEL HURLEY:

Hurley's slow-paced folk songs seem perfect for a two year old, and Soren especially loves the Pool Hall song, where Hurley makes the sound of cue balls knocking against each other.

I also put "Portland Water" on this cd, perhaps for obvious reasons.

 BJORK + DIRTY PROJECTORS:

If i was ever surprised by Soren liking a cd, it was this one. It's pretty artsy, and most of my adult friends wouldn't really like it. But it has this nice simplicity to it, even if the songs do have off-kilter harmonies and syncopations. This is evidence that my two year old son has better taste in music than most college students.

He calls it the "whale cd," so a whale ended up on the cover.

Try as we might to interest him in making train tracks or doing long math equations, I'm afraid that a love of music is already permanently ingrained in his head. I don't blame him... i just hope he doesn't try to pursue it as a career! :)